Without further ado, tonight's America's Next Top Model recap (spoiler city)...

The girls get spokesmodel lessons from Tyson Beckford and are split into teams and told to come up with a commercial for Keep a Child Alive. Heather, Jenah and Ambreal are the winners, which seems a bit baffling as their Bob Dylan "Subterranean Homesick Blues" flash card ad was a little clumsy. Heather also gets to do a Mary J. Blige art directed shoot for a natural products line called Carol's Daughter.

The rest of the models head home and have a pizza slumber party and it was interesting to see them all get along so well which makes me wonder about how much friction there really is between Bianca and the others. I'm a total sucker, aren't I? That I'm even perplexed about this must make me look like such a naive little goob.

These Cover Girl commercials with Jaslene crack me up. I bet they're so bummed they're stuck with her. I can't understand a word that girl (is she a girl?) says. Renee or Natasha should have won last season.

This week's photo shoot centers around the concept of recyclable materials (I love how ANTM tries to teach us social and political lessons). Heather manages to look straight at the camera over aluminum cans (and resembles Morticia Addams in the final photo), Chantal pretends she's paper (and ends up looking like a dude but the panel loves her), Sarah is... trash... I think (and did I actually hear Nigel fuss about her losing weight?), Saleisha looks like an ad for Goodyear tires (but somehow manages to make Tootie look hot), Ebony is, err, bubble wrap (I wouldn't have looked excited, either, but snarling might not have been appropriate), Jenah blends in among the cardboard boxes (but her picture, once again, is stunning. She's really growing on me), Bianca smiles with her eyes at oil (but gets complaints about looking stiff), Lisa uses her limbs well among the plastic bottles (but Tyra says it's too Modeling 101) and Ambreal reads the newspaper (but nobody's interested in what she has to convey).

Also, what's this I hear about Tyra kissing Lance Bass? I guess she had to prove that her hotness transcends sexual orientation. I know I've turned into a Tyra fan (much to my dismay), but I'm just not sure it does.

The judges deliberate (and does Miss Jay's afro keep getting bigger and bigger? I love it!) and, oh my goodness, in a 'is this or isn't it real moment of drama?' they pick Ambreal to go, but Ebony says she doesn't want to be there anymore! Tyra says she hates a quitter and lets her go! Both girls are in tears as Ambreal gets a reprieve and Ebony heads out the door. Cue dramatic music and credits!

Now it's off to Criminal Minds where I don't miss Mandy Patinkin all that much. I'm still watching Gossip Girl but I have no idea why. The whole "life sucks when you're rich and beautiful" routine is a bit a) played out and b) hard to swallow.

In other TV news, I am uber irked that Pete Wentz is starring in an upcoming episode of Law and Order. Can this show go any further downhill? Does anyone care? I'm trying to think of my favorite L&O combo... Michael Moriarty was a great executive A.D.A. but Sam Waterston is my fave. I miss Chris Noth and Jerry Orbach who had great chemistry as Logan and Briscoe. You know about my inexplicable love for Angie Harmon and I don't think they'll find a better District Attorney than Steven Hill. So, it's sad to watch a much beloved drama lumber towards its inevitable demise Fall Out Boy-style.

Tomorrow it's back to California for Tom and me. MMJ are super excited to play Neil Young's Bridge School Benefit (and I'm excited to shoot it and spend anniversary #2 with the hubs). The Bridge School is a non-profit organization, co-founded in 1986 by Young's wife Pegi, whose mission is to ensure that individuals with severe speech and physical impairments achieve full participation in their communities. A very worthy cause, indeed.

All I have to say is Kirk Hammett, here I come!!! I'm going to find out what kind of monster you are! Okay, we all know what I'm really going to do is stand several feet away and possibly giggle (so Metallica attorneys, you need not get a restraining order), but a girl can dream about becoming BFF's with the sensitive Mr. H, right?!

Toodles,
Ms. P

Labels: america's next top model, music